I have really been kind of bothered lately over something that happened one night last week. I volunteer my time every Thursday night at Church while people come and do Bible Study in their small groups. My daughter comes with me and Dakota goes to a group for his age. Well there is another Autistic Boy who comes into the day care. He is high functioning. Let me tell you the kid is awesome!
Well this is his second time the autistic boy was with me. Well a person came in and we started talking about the mother of the autistic boy. She almost didn’t come because she felt like her child was always the bad one. I started to get a little upset because from what I saw he was over stimulated and that’s why he did what he did. So I thought about it for a minute and I said you want me to call her. I don’t want this to stop her from coming. I have been in her shoes and I am not afraid to use distraction or redirection. We weren’t to call her at all. Well there was no need to call her out of the small group because it was all manageable.
The person that was in the Day Care I don’t really think she understands what autism is. For one she doesn’t have kids and secondly she thinks he is just being bad and he should know better. Well sort of. He does know better however with how loud it was he couldn’t control himself. So every time I saw him start to lose control I called him over and said I have a secret for you. He was so excited and so happy and it made him feel proud. I just picked something random, like my favorite color is blue. We also started playing games first with the older kids so it was a little quieter too. That seemed to help a lot. We played charades and he got really technical about the animals. But the cool thing was I noticed that he knew ALOT about animals and I was so very interested in what he had to say. We also talked about an Ipad game and he drew me pictures of dragons from his game.
I guess lately this whole thing has really bothered me because I honestly think we need more awareness about what is autism and a little chat from the heart about what it’s like to have an autistic child. Our county has nothing that supports autism. That is hopefully about to change soon. I plan to hopefully get up and running after the holidays.
Anyway my whole point of this post is don’t judge a book by it’s cover. Just because a child acts out doesn’t me the child is bad or doing it on purpose. Whether he knows it’s wrong or not it might be something that can’t be helped. Find different ways to cope with it. Try different ideas. Let the child inspire you or inspire the child. Don’t say that the child is bad. I think we get tired of hearing that. Try to understand and ask questions I know I would be glad to answer them as well as other parents.
I totally understood how that parent felt as I have been her shoes. I have cringed when Dakota would act out and all I would get was dirty looks or comments about how bad he was. He wasn’t bad he just couldn’t handle the stress and that was his way of dealing with it. So backing up before she went to her small group I talked with the mother son and I hope that I made her feel comfortable because I understood. I told her exactly what I did and his reactions. Her little one started calling for her that night. I picked him up and he fell asleep in my arms for almost 45 minutes. His brother would come over and say is he sleeping? checking on him.
I get inspired watching him on Thursday and just listening to him talk about things and how he interacts. My son Dakota inspires me a lot too. Especially while we are doing homework. I get inspired to create things to help as he learns. Same thing for my daughter. I love the creativity in the art they do.
Anyway I think I got off topic and bounced around here and I apologize. Maybe this wasn’t informing you about what Autism is but more so what it’s like to deal with an autistic child and things you can do to try to understand. It was an observance that really hit close to home. Names were left out on purpose.
No I don’t think the people judging in this story or calling it bad behavior are bad people. I chalk it up to not understanding and trying to promote more awareness and understanding. The lady is a really nice lady. This wasn’t meant to draw attention at people or point them out. It was about something I noticed and how I felt.